Poets and Saints
…and the moms who try to be both.Archive for Saint Mama
Falling Without Fear
The transition from baby to toddler is something of a metamorphosis. First they are this helpless, squirmy thing, spitting up all over themselves while smiling at the ceiling fan. Then they become a little person who throws their peas and dances in circles and tells you no when you try to join in. This dance is all about them.
Young children are particular. They change their minds. One day they like fettucine; the next day they won’t touch it. They are happy, then pleading; they dawdle, then run away from you when it is time to go. They say amen after the itsy bitsy spider, not realizing amen is saved for prayers. Perhaps the word amen is not only for the reverent times when our heads our bowed and eyes are closed, but it is for all of life. Amen to the joyous times. Amen to the showers. Amen to life.
The tomatoes are ripening and the vines are weighed low with the fruit. The first one off the vine is a small green one, compliments of my daughter. She picked it herself. I’m trying to teach her that it is only the red ones we pick–the rest we leave hanging to ripen in the sun. They are not ready–not yet–but she is. She runs in the patio door, her hands full of tomatoes, exuberant in her find. She hands me an orange one first. We have made progress. At least it is not green, or smashed, or half-eaten. I cut them up and give her a taste. More? she asks. That night she eats all of them off her plate. Amen for homegrown tomatoes.
Afterward, daddy chases her around the room and she comes barreling toward me, falling into my arms for safety. There is no hesitation when she falls, it is full body forward with no fear. There is something about that motion that is full of faith. Not the kind of faith that reconsiders, or hems and haws, or doubts for a moment, but is the fully trusting, never wavering, falling in mid-air kind of faith. It is the kind I’d like to have, and not just on my good days either, but even on the days when the news is bleak and the worry is bubbling up in me like a chemistry experiment gone awry. I want to fall, not hoping that someone will catch me, but instead, never doubting there was any other option but to be caught.
Amen for falling without fear. Amen for the faith of a child.
*This blog originally appeared in August 2007.
My Thursday Inspiration
I have been involved in a great bible study this year called Bible Study Fellowship (BSF). It is an interdenominational bible study that meets at various churches thoughout the world. As it so happens, one BSF group meets at my church and I am just finishing up my first year of study which was on the life of Moses.
This has been my first bible study since having children and I was a little unsure about how I as going to keep up with the lessons. That sounds dumb to me since I only have one child. How hard can it be to find 15 minutes a day? But I am surprised how busy my days can be even with one child. Anyway, I have found various ways to manage it, by carving out a little quiet time during the afternoon or later in the evening. Thursday is the day we meet and get a chance to discuss our week’s lesson in a discussion group. Then we listen to a lecture on that day’s lesson. It’s a chance to worship and learn about God, get some soul-refreshment and a break, and lets my daughter have some great Bible learning time in BSF’s children’s program, where she learns the same scripture that the adults study. I have been very impressed with the kids’ program and my daughter loves it. It’s very structured, yet creative and has a purpose. (On a side note: It’s only for ages 2 through 6 for the daytime program.)
Next year we are studying the book of John–my favorite gospel. I took a January term class on it in college, but since that was more than ten years ago, I am in need of a good refresher course.
If anyone is interested in finding out more, you can attend an introductory class to find out what it’s all about. There are also evening classes and men’s classes, but there are class size limitations for both adults and children. Many people sign up in May for next Fall’s study, but if you choose to wait until September you might still get in (that’s how I did it). For those of you who live around here, I can give you more information about the class and introductory dates.
I only have a few more weeks left until BSF goes on summer break, but I am already thinking of a few spiritual books I want to read this summer…
- All I need is Jesus and a Good Pair of Jeans by Susanna Foth Aughtmon (I am currently in a book club for this one, so we’ll finish it this summer.)
- Don’t Waste Your Life by John Piper
And then of course there’s my summer fun books that I read too (more on that later). Not that spiritual books can’t be fun, but I think you know what I mean! Oh, I can’t wait for summer.
